Unlearning the Filter Through Children's Honesty

 
Unlearning the Filter Through Children's Honesty

A silence settled just before the lights lifted. My chest tightened, pulse rising alongside the murmurs of children shuffling on stage. This gathering marked another year passing quietly by. Expectation hung thick, though not from obligation - absence during the prior event left space for something new to emerge. Preparation had stretched across evenings, small efforts building without announcement. Evening sunlight touched fabric yesterday when he pulled on the outfit at our kitchen table; stillness followed, then motion - an awareness brightening behind his eyes unlike anything seen lately. Fully immersed, not merely prepared. Each line familiar, so were the rhythms, likewise the motions.

The true impact emerged before the performance began, shaped by how presence was offered in those preceding days. What mattered most unfolded offstage, through small decisions made each morning.

The Power Of Listening

This moment marked a change, shaped by intent. Rather than question his choices with repeated queries about actions and methods, silence became my response. Space opened where words could emerge without pressure. Listening arrived quietly, steady, when he offered an idea or began a gesture. Interruptions stayed absent. Suggestions like “perhaps this” never formed. Expression moved freely, unguided

What changed was the shift from judgment to support. Rather than sizing him up, I chose phrases that shielded his inner world - naming him resilient, fearless, steady. Simple? Perhaps. Even laughable at first glance - yet somehow transformative. When expectation faded, space appeared. Confidence grew there.

The Performance of a Lifetime

On the morning everything began, his performance lifted into something more. Movement followed by voice, then gesture - each part carried an unfiltered energy hard to anticipate. That moment changed how I saw it all. What stood out was learning coming from him, not the other way around. A lesson unfolded: presence matters most when it feels alive

Mess is acceptable. Presence suffers when perfection takes over.

Patience is a superpower.

Solitude shapes existence when choice leads. One path stands clear - walking it defines being.

The Lesson Is Being Yourself

Life tends to fill with invisible screens, shaped by concern over opinions. A child once pointed out something simple: openness draws connection more than caution ever does. Ceasing acts meant for approval shifts where attention lands. Authenticity, it turns out, gathers presence without asking. The right people arrive quietly, already listening.

A whisper from childhood stayed with me. Expression flows differently when untouched by demand. Outcomes grow beyond prediction then. Children show this quietly. Filterless moments hold clarity. Imperfection fits naturally there.

"Rangoli and Toastmasters: Crafting a Brighter, Meaningful Life"*.

 

While life is made of varied moments, some traditions and interests seem incongruous to each other on first view but share deep similarities in their transformational effect on humans. Take Rangoli, the intricate art of creating colorful patterns on the floor during festivals like Diwali, and Toastmasters, the worldwide organization of public speaking clubs. Fundamentally, both are about creativity, community, and self-improvement: brightening lives and fostering growth individually.

Rangoli is an ancient Indian art in which colored powders, flowers, or rice are elaborately laid out in symmetric designs to adorn the threshold and verandah of every house. No two Rangolis are identical, as it reflects the mood, creativity, and culture of the artist. Likewise, in Toastmasters, members execute various roles-from speaking to evaluating-and all these different roles chisel different facets of one's personality. Just as a Rangoli artist experiments with colors to create joy or serenity, similarly, Toastmasters participants progress through impromptu speeches, leadership roles, and feedback sessions, adding depth to their confidence and effective communication. Just like the brightest colors of a Rangoli immediately elevate the space around it, similarly, one single meeting of the Toastmasters fills life with newer perspectives and interactive support.

Beyond aesthetics, Rangoli is an emotional outlet that spreads positivity and joy in celebrations. It is a group activity in which families and neighbors come together to reinforce their relationships. Similarly, Toastmasters builds a caring environment in which members provide constructive feedback, share stories, and celebrate each other's achievements. This is not about public speaking alone; it's about self-improvement. With each prepared speech or impromptu talk, one learns resilience, empathy, and adaptability-skills that go far beyond the club room and make our daily interactions with others a lot more enriching.

Diwali, the festival of lights, amplifies these themes. The diya, a small oil lamp, symbolizes hope and clarity, reminding us that even in the darkest times, a single spark can light up the way ahead. This resonates deeply with my own journey. After leaving Toastmasters in 2017 because life got in the way, I felt an emptiness-a void where growth once flourished. Returning in September 2024 was transformative, like lighting a diya in a shadowed room. The club's structured yet flexible framework reignited my passion for self-expression, offering tools to rediscover my voice and purpose. It wasn't just about speaking; it was about rebuilding confidence, forging meaningful connections, and embracing leadership in unexpected ways. Fundamentally, both Rangoli and Toastmasters are journeys of self-discovery: Rangoli transforms a blank canvas into a masterpiece of color and form, while Toastmasters molds individuals into eloquent leaders and empathetic communicators. They teach us that growth comes from embracing variety—whether in patterns or roles—and that community support is the spark that sustains it. In a world often clouded by uncertainty, these practices remind us to seek out those illuminating experiences. If you're feeling stuck, try picking up some colors to create a Rangoli or stepping into a Toastmasters meeting. Who knows? Your next creation or speech might just light the path to your brightest self.

Importance of handmade chocolate.

 

Sweetening the Bond: Handmade Chocolates for Raksha Bandhan

Raksha Bandhan, a cherished festival celebrating the unique bond between siblings, is just around the corner, falling on August 9th, 2025. While the traditional sweets are always a welcome part of the festivities, why not add a special touch this year with delicious, personalized, handmade chocolates?

Beyond the Ordinary: The Charm of Handmade

Handmade gifts, unlike their mass-produced counterparts, carry a unique charm and sentimental value that truly speak volumes. When you craft chocolates yourself, you're not just offering a sweet treat, but a tangible representation of your love, care, and the effort you poured into making the occasion special for your sibling.

A Deliciously Healthy Indulgence

One of the great advantages of making chocolates at home is the ability to control the quality of ingredients. You can choose high-quality cocoa, prioritize natural sweeteners like honey or maple syrup, and even boost the nutritional value by incorporating healthy add-ins like nuts, seeds, and dried fruits. This ensures a healthier and more nutritious indulgence than many store-bought options that often contain excessive sugar and unhealthy fats. Studies suggest that natural chocolates, especially dark chocolate, are rich in antioxidants, beneficial for heart health, and can even act as mood boosters by stimulating endorphin production.

Making it Memorable: Personalized Touches

The beauty of handmade chocolates lies in their potential for personalization. You can:

• Experiment with Flavors: Infuse your chocolates with your sibling's favorite flavors – think orange zest, chili flakes, or a hint of cardamom.
• Shape and Decorate: Use molds to create unique shapes or decorate with edible glitter, sprinkles, or even personalized messages with edible markers.
• Thoughtful Packaging: Package your homemade chocolates in a beautifully decorated box, jar, or tin, adding a personalized label or a handwritten note to express your affection.

Be queen of your life

 Be queen of your own life.

There is a saying that every queen should have a king so that she can have happy life. And people do follow this saying. Also there are people who will question you when you are single and crossed 30s. Quietly lately i m facing this saying in my life , mostly when it comes to my career life. This is just phase which is going to be there and it will passes on,i think most of you have gone through it. Also when it comes working with women organization there will be a women whose only job is to talk about our in- laws or husband gossip when it comes to lunch time . Now imagine how i m dealing with such women , daily some gossip will occur and then there a time and they will ask me that question " beta shaddi kab kar rahi ho?  Apki umar bad jayegi? " or if not this a simple taunt " you first do marriage and then u will get to know what m saying.

Indian mentality of women wont change and if they find that you wont fit in there box they will used such tactic to pull you down. This is similar to crab mentality.At first when this was going in my life i used to get frustrated, irritated. Now when this happen i just enjoy it by laughing at them. Come on girls i realised that i m girl who have achived very much in my life at young age ,which they have not , maybe that i reason which they have not done it, they do such thing because they are insure in there life that is reason they used such tactic in your life. Here if you feel you have problem in you life.  Pat you back and says to yourself, and remember you are queen of your life .

Girls you are more powerful than they are. Remember the toughest time in your life when there were  people who used to quote that " oh you are too old to achieved you goals but you ignored there sayong and focused on your goal and you achieved it .  You were able to achieved there goals as you took it as challenge. Think you are queen and it is your life  and you are more powerful than them , 

A queen is not like fairy tail that we seen in movies. It is also full of obstacles , politics. So how she deals with everything in her life? She deal with it because she have will power in her self and she trust her gut feeling. Also when our life will have obstacles we become matured enough to deal with it because of experiences that our life teaches us. Think like queen and act.

Friendship Day

Friendship

Yes we all know that 1st Sunday of August is celebrated as Friendship day. Do you really remember how it is originated?

Friendship Day
Type	Historical
Date	varies: 30 July (UN), first Sunday of August
Frequency	annual
Related to	Friendship Love

Friendship Day, Chinese: 国际友谊日, French: Journée internationale de l’amitié, Russian: Международный день дружбы, Spanish: Día del Amigo, Hindi: मित्रता दिवस) is a day for celebrating friendship. The day is a popular celebration in several Asian countries since it was first proposed in 1958 in India as the 'International Friendship Day'.

Those who promote the holiday in South Asia attribute the tradition of dedicating a day in honor of friends to have originated in the United States in 1935, but it actually dates from 1919. The exchange of Friendship Day gifts like flowers, cards and wrist bands is a popular tradition of this occasion.^[1][2]

Friendship Day celebrations occur on different dates in different countries. The first World Friendship Day was proposed for 30 July in 1958, by the World Friendship Crusade.^[3] On 27 April 2011 the General Assembly of the United Nations declared^[4] 30 July as official International Friendship Day. However, some countries, including India^[5], celebrate Friendship Day on the first Sunday of August. In Oberlin, Ohio, Friendship Day is celebrated on 8 April each year.

History

Friendship Day was originated by Joyce Hall, the founder of Hallmark cards in 1930, intended to be 2 August and a day when people celebrated their friendships by holiday celebrations.^{[citation needed]} Friendship Day was promoted by the greeting card National Association during the 1920s but met with consumer resistance – given that it was too obviously a commercial gimmick to promote greetings cards. By the 1940s the number of Friendship Day cards available in the U.S. by had dwindled and the holiday largely died out there.^{[citation needed]} There is no evidence to date for its uptake in Europe; however, it has been kept alive and revitalised in Asia, where several countries have adopted it.

In honor of Friendship Day in 1998, Nane Annan, wife of UN Secretary-General Kofi Annan, named Winnie the Pooh as the world's Ambassador of Friendship at the United Nations

Now this question pop me.. Do friends matter to you? Do they really play importance in life? this question seems to simple to you and you all may have different answer to it. Is it really needed to be in touch with friends ? Some may say Yes and some may say no too.

  

Now let me tell you my Story of my life to you . My childhood played a really important role in choosing my friends in my life. From childhood i was ugly duckling, weido or you may say a difficult child to handle and so it still there.   I was Special child as i was forcip baby and thus resulted into my so called medical problem '' epilapsy" and that  led to social problem - behavioral problem - Psychological problem- Relationship problem. So it is vicious circle .  it took me year to come out of it , still i feel people find it difficult to deal with me. Yes , you all know that how much we as Indian call us progressive but when it comes to relationship they will follow thumb rule ( Judgmental) based on information they get. Let me tell you  an advice." Never give them explanation for your behavior, because they will either think you as criminal or they will again judge you based on useless assumption and they will make you feel more guilty."

So Since i was small i needed lot friends to listen to me and to get that i made lot of efforts, used to gives parties,take some side ,gossip. Then came teenage phase , when i realized that my so called friends are worthy of being my friends as for them only money and power matter. Years latter now i regard them as HI or Bye friends whose only motto is to keep you updating about there life and getting to know where are in you in your life. Believe me meeting with such friends is pulling you self down. 

I am grateful to my friends who met in my life and make my life beautiful by rediscovering me and who where on my side during my tuff time. i am grateful to you all.

My past experience taught me so many lesson .

• Do not be judgmental.
• Have your privacy ( no sharing goals ,dreams etc)
• Never crave for friends.

If you really want to achieve something more in your life, work on yourself , be bold and be happy. your real friend is your own self. It is only one who will guide you to your path when you are lost. Believe in yourself, go with gut feeling.Give yourself time, pamper yourself because when you do all above you will rediscover yourself and will be happy.

Be bold to accept who you are.

Is marriage compulsory in life? Why it is often that when a marriage is broken society will blame girl only? And even if she marries late society will blame her by labeling her that she has got attitude problem or for her keeping boy is like playing with toy. I mean seriously if a boy does same thing he is never blamed just because he is a boy. I sometimes feel  frustrated that for sake of society you have to do so and so.

 Now-a-days hot topic of our life is either keeping boyfriend or to get married just when you cross you 20s. And yes I feel really pity that girls often accept this marriage concept. They fall inin this trap of marriage direct and indirect ways. Of course why we should blame only on girls only for this, we should blame so called society because right from the childhood we are taught that girl are born to marriage and give birth to life that is mandatory rule of life. On top if we are not taught this we have so called stories books to tell that your price charming will come and shield you from your life troubles. Why we gave importance to male gender? 

Come on girls seriously you are so week that you need bodyguard to keep to safe and happy.... Girl is on your own, do not reliable on anyone. And yes for sake of society do not change yourself or crash your dream just because you are in your 20s. Yes you can wear anything you like; you can buy your own enjoyment ring. I know this decision are tuff but bold enough to face it.

Let me set you all example of myself. I have made choices in my life, made mistake and I do not regret it because it taught me some or other thing and most importantly made be stronger. My heart is strong enough and pure enough to get through my choices that I made. Whenever I was hurt or broken down I took it as challenge and took effort to put my dreams and goal to achieve it.  Yes I’m in my early 30s and I do not regret that I’m still single and happy by not getting married and having babies. Because  deep down I know I will find my soul mate sooner who will accept me as I am and would not regret me because I’m unique in my way. He will not weaken me but definitely make me perfect through his perfection.

Dual personality disorder is so common??

Dual
Personality disorder is so common?

Last
week I was met my friend in one of friend in function and so our chatting with
simple question how we each of us played different role in our daily life. Then
all of sudden one of my friend give me new that our most famous friend is
visiting Psychiatrist as she is suffering from DID (Dissociation Identity
Disorder) or to laymen terms “Split Personality Disorder”.

When
I heard this news I was so supposed to be shock and Surprise according to her
reaction but she was Surprise when I take this matter as lightly and my
reaction was cool to her news. This may sounds weird to all and you can call me
“weirdo”. If you all think I am “weirdo” then I accept the fact I m and so do
you all are??

Well
let me Share few example how we all live with having D.I.D / Split personality
Disorder without our notice.

1.  
Few of you have got job or are entrepreneur
in your field. Do you behave same way as you are in your home or vise-versa??
Do you do this role changing consciously?? Does that me we do not have Split
personality as we show symptoms of it according to DSMV.

2.  
At home we all play different role as per our
relation. We play role of Son, brother, husband, Son-in-law etc. if you are boy
whereas you play role of daughter, sister, mother, mother-in-law, granddaughter
etc. Do we take conscious effort to do all such role???

3.  
I recently lost my granny and my uncle (mom
brother).At their death I play role of loving granddaughter and niece
respectfully. Like a strong women I did whatever I need to do or more
specifically act like one. In laymen term I handle situation in more of less
calm manner without shedding tear. Does that mean I am emotionless, cold
blooded heart person just because I did not shed tear during their last rites??

  No it just according to me my
way of sharing emotion is different. Why or how I act such manner if u asks me
in such situation. Well frankly speaking I cannot tell you as I still do not
know why I do such thing. One thing is very sure during such situation I get
into split personality of me (Strong women) who knows that she has to be strong
and calm as if I grow week this time that will look after my family?

Admit the fact I have my secret life and I do not share it with anyone. I
am not social butterfly to put everything of my life event of fob etc. Does
that mean I am introvert or secretive type of person?  Yes if you feel I am then I accept I am. Over
the year I have realized that world will see what they want to see.

Fact of Split personality or DID

Ø  D.I.D is Psychological
disorder according to DSMV.

Ø  Symptom’s:- Lapses In
attention, Distraction To Something Else, Day Dreaming etc.

Ø  According to definition
“ the presence of 2 or more personality State” accompanied by the inability to
recall personal information and loss of referring to time, sense of self and
consciousness.

Ø  E.g.:- SYBIL is an American
film which is based on book names same. It is a real story of person who had
such disorder. Her name was Shirley Adrel Manson and inside her reside her 13
split personality that have their own identity.